Wasabi Ghost

Lidl are pretty good at running these 'flavours of the world' weeks, and despite their Mexican week consisting mainly of chilli con carne and Fajitas, this weeks Asian one has had some decent goodies filling the shelves, including these Wasabi Nuts that I grabbed for 99p. Wasabi isn't much used in foods in the UK and being a fan of hotter grub, I had to try some. Bloody nice they were too, very moreish, much more so than boring old Pringles (never did understand the fuss over those anyway).
I recommend the Cassava Crackers too. Oh and Coconut water. Its fast become a sober favourite. Just make sure you chill the tins, I imagine warm coconut water tasting none to good.

Crimbo Socks Clean Off

Psycho Scratchins x12

Quick recap over the Christmas snacks over 2013 (most were HOT)


spices, pickles, peanuts



Breakfast laverbread & egg

Hot Spaghetti

As the nights draw in and cruel Mr Frost arrives with his icy talons, offing pensioners and making British Gas merry, the need for heat is now pretty much priority to us Brits. If you are a fan of hot sauce like my good self, you can get warm for free too (minus cost of sauce obviously), eliminating the need to walk around indoors in scarf and five jumpers. Win!! It works too! Regular readers of these blogs will know the kid of crazy heat these sauces throw out. Believe me, its quite comical reading how friends on Facebook are freezing their azzes off while I am sitting in a tee shirt, sweating buckets.

Psycho Scratchin's

Come to papa!

Man has been searching for the perfect 'pub snack' ever since we brewed that first beer. Alcohol gives you the munchies, and for a while, bags of salted peanuts (pinned to cardboard featuring a naked woman, remember those?) seemed to be the Daddy. Not any more, daddy has found a hotter model. And when I say HOT, think Christie Brinkley wearing nothing but high heels, a come-to-bed smile and holding a neon sign saying F**KING HOT.
Ladies and gentlemen, moshers and maggots, I bring thee Psycho Scratchin's! Or rather Dr Burnorium (www.hotsauceemporium.co.uk) does, since he is the evil genius behind these fabulously, fiery snacks of awesome. Yup, the creator of Psycho Juice hot sauce has gone and done it again. Praise the lord (of hot stuff.) I didn't think pork crackling could get better but holy sweet pepper, Psycho Scratchin's are the dog's wotsits. It took all my willpower, paper thin at the best of times, not to eat three bags in one go. Moreish isn't the word (well it is but you know what I mean.)
Delicious pork rind liberally dusted with Ghost Pepper (Naga Jolokia) with a satisfying crunch, and as a bonus these don't taste half as salty as inferior crackling. I love the heat of these too, face melt for sure, but a very pleasant face melt! (See me eating them in vid below.) If you fancy something different, put down that dry roasted peanut, and head on over to Dr Burnorium's Hot Sauce Emporium and order some. I guarantee you'll be back for more, these are special indeed.
Now this is the third time I have featured Dr Burnorium's sauces and snacks in my blogs and before anyone starts wondering if I am on his payroll or not, nope, im not. The reason for these 'reviews' is simple; when I discover a fantastic product I get excited (like getting a new Slayer album,) I want to share it with others so they don't miss out, I want to 'give it props' as our American cousins would say. Go tell it on the mountain! Or perhaps volcano would be more apt in this case since these Scratchin's are like little lava chunks, waiting to melt in yer gob in a fireball of great flavour and wicked heat.
So no payroll here, just a very satisfied customer who will keep returning for more Psycho Juice awesomness. Pain shouldn't taste this good.

Curry Bombin' Rissoles

The RissoDaloo™

Heads up Moshers, I bring you lucky headbangers yet another exclusive culinary experience that im pretty certain you haven't tried anywhere else. I call it the RissoDaloo™ and needless to say, it kicks f**king ass! Colour me proud, I love it when a plan comes together (cheers Hannibal!) You want to know something? I don't want to blow an eight ton trumpet here but if it wasn't for folk like me, Mankind would never have discovered the Hot Dog or Cheeseburger. Hashtag FACT.
I love messing around with favourite snacks, and adding my own wicked little twist.
Sometimes it ends up as Epic Fail, like that time I tried a pie sandwich (too 'bready') but occasionally I nail it and we get bacon! Or spicy rissole in this instance. Consistency wise the RissoDaloo™ was slightly thick and heavy but I suspect throwing a handful of chips (fries) onto the plate would solve this. Couple of important points to consider however: adjust sauce to whatever heat level you are comfortable with (Da Bomb will be too hot for newbies) and stick to buying readymade Vindaloo sauce from supermarkets. Why? Because generally these types are not full whack Vindaloo strength, the last thing you want to be doing is adding hot sauce to a good homemade curry (a well made Vindaloo is hot enough.)
Now im not going to say my new creation is gonna change the face of planet, pizza style but if you ever fancy a spicy munch with a definite difference, then my RissoDaloo™ is well worth a shot.


Into the pot

The Toothless Vindaloo

A Carmarthen favourite

Ask a Carmarthen local which Indian restaurant/takeaway is best and there is a good chance they will tell you its Ginger. Read the reviews on websites like TripAdvisor, those will say the same thing. Fancy a good curry in west Wales? Ginger is the place to be. I would normally agree too, only recently they lost a chef to a rival restaurant and when I ordered a takeout from there last Friday, it wasn't up to their usual great standard. Maybe it was an off night? (Though eateries should never have those.) Or perhaps more care is taken with sit down meals? Who knows, but the meal I had was nothing special.
Being a big fan of hot and spicy grub, I naturally ordered a Lamb Vindaloo, special fried rice and chips (fries) but as soon as I had peeled off the cardboard cover of my rice, I knew I was going to be disappointed. The rice looked too yellow, like the cheap stuff you see in supermarkets and the chips were hard. Im a big fan of chips bought in Indian takeaways, they are usually chunky and golden, often better than those found at chippys (fish & chip shops) but these were a very poor show. And as for the Vindaloo itself? It seriously could have passed for a Pasanda or a Bhuna. It was mild to say the least and as for breaking out in sweat? Not a chance! Now I readily admit that due my habit of smashing hot sauces over every meal, my tolerance for spicy food has increased tenfold but come on! A Vindaloo should never be compared to a f**king Pasanda. Im willing to bet that a Korma fan would have coped with it.
I take no pleasure in writing this. In fact I am genuinely sorry to have to write such a negative article about a local place but its the truth my friends. Even the free poppadum was soft.

Feasts of Metal rating: 2/5

My Lamb Vindaloo

Plant Page Curry Combo

Yummy for the tummy

All Hail (capital H hail) moshers! I bring to thee another wonderful meal which won't cost the earth but will almost certainly make it MOVE! Not to mention light you up like a firecracker up an arsonists azz. All you need is a Mayflower beef curry (can be bought in Farmfoods £1.39p) a carton of their egg fried rice (75p) and a teaspoon of Blair's Ultra Death hot sauce (800,000 Scoville Heat Units of hot.) Takes around 8 minutes of nuking in the micro (but you can use the oven) and the taste? F**king DIVINE, proper bloody lusho!
Its like a moshpit on yer tongue but BEWARE ONLY CHILIHEADS NEED APPLY because at 800,000 SHU, the Death sauce turns this usually tame curry into a ravenous sabre toothed kitty cat on the hunt for your screaming, melting innards. Im not joking either, regular readers of this blog will know from previous posts that the Ultra Death sauce isn't messing around.
I have added Blairs to many curries over the last few months but Mayflowers has brought the best results. Its truly very tasty. Also, unlike other readymade curries who skimp on the meat, Mayflowers has a tidy bit of beef in there, so be careful not to overcook (over nuke?) in the micro because if you do? It gets tough.
If you enjoy Vindaloo, this is a decent alternative if you can't be fussed with heading out to a takeaway. In fact its better when you compare it to some of the shoddier takeaways lurking on our high streets. It was definitely a great way to finish off my bottle of Ultra Death (see empty bottle below.) So I had better sign off this post and get ordering more!

Bah

Dave's Burning Nuts

Dave's Burning Nuts! Not too hot (in my humble opinion) but to be fair to Dave, I think my tolerance for hot foods has shot up since I discovered the wicked world of hot sauce. So to anyone not familiar with the beautiful burn, these peanuts will probably blow their pants off. I still enjoyed them mind, 50x better than a packet of regular dry roasted, and there was a pleasant tingle in the back of my throat after a few fistfuls. I guess I expected the whack of a super hot. I will be buying the "Da Bomb Nuts" next, which i'm told are a wee bit hotter but I would still give Dave's Nuts a solid 7/10 because they are a darned fine peanut which has a pleasant tingle about them. Crisps? F**k that, get some snacks that belong in the metal world inside you.

*If you fancy trying them for yourself, head on over to Dr Burnorium's Hot Sauce Emporium and he'll sort you out good. A fine fellow, tell him I sent you.

Fiery burp

The Beans Are Coming

You will be needing Balls

Quite fancy being a foody agony aunt today so here goes:

"I like to read British mysteries. Strangely, the food most often mentioned in this genre is "beans on toast", evidently an everyday item used for breakfast lunch or dinner (at least according to the authors). Being a lover of (Boston type) baked beans, I tried some on wheat toast. Didn't seem to be different enough to make it worthwhile. Am I missing something? Did I use the right kind of beans or bread? Could some Brits fill in the blanks here?"

Sure can my Colonial chum! What you will be needing:

1. Good quality bread is a MUST, woe betide if you opt for cheap own brand supermarket scut.
2. Ditto baked beans. You really DO NOT want to be choosing the 21p "value" beans. Nothing "snobby" about it, the cheap baked beans have a high salt content. Mind you Heinz could be accused of being too salty as well, so I use Branston.

While the baked beans are simmering on the hob (I suppose you could nuke them in the microwave but im old fashioned) toast a slice of bread. Some like it almost burnt but me? I prefer a light toasting so that the toast is the colour of a matchstick. Make sure you butter the toast while its hot so that all that buttery goodness melts into the bread. This is important! As soon as the beans are hot (hot not warm) pour them over the toast. Serve and enjoy!
I know a lot of folks like to eat this snack with their hands but using a knife and fork is usually the wisest method because it prevents the beans and tomato sauce (not ketchup) spilling all over your lap/carpet/cat. Only use your hands if you are stingy in slopping out the beans but don't be a beany miser, pour that sh!t on good!
If you happen to have some good Cheddar cheese lurking in the fridge (definitely not that processed rubbish) melt some of that and plonk it on top of the baked beans. Makes a great dish even tastier! Of course if you want extra flavour but don't like cheese, the braver readers among you could do what I do and put some HOT SAUCE over the beans. It really adds a pleasant nip, and my personal recommendation would be Psycho Juice Red Savina by the evil (but in a good way) Dr Burnorium. His Psycho Juice range are fantastic.

Blair's After Death Sauce

Blair's Ultra Death Sauce

Sweet Chilli O' Mine

Bought a bottle of Blair's Ultra Death Sauce this week to replace my empty Mega Death bottle. Its a step up from Mega and contains red habanero pods, cayenne chilies, pirri-pirri chilies with added Naga Jolokia peppers and is a eye watering, nut melting 800,000 Scoville Units.

Icarus Wings

Not hot but tasty!

Discovered some hot sauces in the supermarkets a few days ago and seeing as ive become a big fan of them, it would have been rude for me not to have picked them up. The sauce in the pic cost just £2 from Tesco, a Heinz ~ Yellow Habanero. "A fiery yellow chilli sauce with sweetness to balance its searing heat." The guff on their website claims. "Ideal for splashing over pizza, pasta, stir fries, chicken, burgers and much more."
Now its a tidy sauce, lush as we say here in Wales but its certainly not "searing heat." Not even close! Hell if Heinz call this "searing heat", Id love to see them try Blair's Death range sauces. It IS tasty though, has a gentle sweetness to it with just a tiny nip to let you know that its trying to be a hot sauce and I will get more. They have two others as well: Chipotle & Garlic (a smokey, medium spiced sauce with a tasty note of garlic) and Green Jalapeño (a hot sauce with a very tangy, almost pickled taste) so will check those out too.

Nightmare on Cawl Street

I have come to the end of the Blair's Mega Death Sauce. Sad times my friends, sad times. (But I do have some Ultra Death on order so happily the burning times are going to keep on rolling and melting my innards like the loudest Motorhead gig.) And as it is the eve of St David's Day I thought it would be a good idea to 'bless' a Cawl (traditional Welsh dish) with the final drops of hot sauce. Result? Well I won't be doing it again because this stuff is much better on burgers and sandwiches. In Cawl/soups it is pretty disgusting it has to be said.
Its hot don't get me wrong. Like I say in the video below, the combined heat from both sauce and cawl makes it feel as though you are eating liquid razorblades but taste wise its pretty darned foul. Another thing to note is that the burn you get from using Blair's hot sauce in things like broth doesn't last as long as when you put some on a beefburger. The heat might be instant and more intense while you're tucking in but 5 minutes after you put down the spoon its barely noticable.



Burny but ych a fi (Welsh = horrid)

Dydd Gwyl Dewi Da Pawb!

Cheese Muerte

Cannibal Sauce!

A Wylde time

Blair's awesome hot (really hot!) sauces have teamed up with the equally cool Zakk Wylde to bring the world Zakk's Shot to Hell Sauce! Part of the blurb reads; the hottest sauce in Zakk's line, this one separates the men from the boys. Be warned, it contains ingredients 600 times hotter than a jalapeño chili. Use sparingly. Not recommended for use without dilution.

So same strength as the Mega Death Sauce? This is going to be the Feasts next purchase to try for the blog. Come to think about it,the hot sauce/metal combo is a f**king great one. Both compliment each other in their extreme versions of their particular talent. Slayer need to team up with Blair and create the Angel Of Death Sauce! Motorhead too, the Killed By Death Sauce! (Blair like to use the word 'death' in their product.) Theres no end to the possibilities, and the more I think about it, the more I feel it would be a raoring success. Hell's blls even the imagery with fire and skulls suit both bnads and sauce.



Beware!

Me v Blair's Death Sauce

Whisky and hot sauce wise?

Blair's Mega Death Sauce - A habanero sauce with cayenne, white vinegar, ancho chilies, chipotles, natural pepper flavor, molasses, guava nectar, ginger, salt, and spices. 550,000 Scoville units. 650 times hotter than a Jalapeño chile.

I did it!! I took on Blair's Mega Death sauce and lived to tell the tale! And to answer the burning question (see what I did there?) YES IT BURNS!! This sauce is not for the faint of heart (or those with cotton lined gullets.) But it is bearable, especially if you enjoy hot/spicy food. A lot of these powerfully strong sauces taste like dirt but this is rather tasty, and has a tomato flavour with a hint of pepper. If it wasn't for the fact it is so potent, I would be replacing my regular ketchup with it.
Most people buy Blair's sauces for the danger or 'novelty facor' (its one way of getting dinner guests talking!) but its so much more than a cheap trick at supper, Blair's Mega Death sauce really does add something special to any meal/snack. It certainly livened up my burger! (I will be adding a drop to my next vindaloo to crank it up further so stay tuned for that.)

I had read a lot of things online about the mega death sauce, some of it wildly exaggerated, some bang on the money accurate but this is what rang true for me the most ~ do not plan on dabbing a drop on your tongue to “get a feel for it”. This is very true, I only used a small blob and it was easily equal in strength to my hottest curry. So be warned: the wise will dilute this sauce with a drop of water if you are not used to hot peppers like the habanero. Im not kidding for the sake of dramatics either!
So final thoughts on Blair's Mega Death sauce; a tasty tang of tomato witha smidge of pepper, EXTREMELY HOT but bearable if you enjoy hot food. Very happy I tried it, will be adding this to a lot more snacks. Gulp!

Bonus extra ~ Its so powerful it works on toothache and headaches too. Seriously, the kick releases an endorphin rush which is the bodies natural painkiller, so it adds a nice extra to your meal.

In another video


Suicide Chicken



Sauce Of The Immortals

Mega Death!!

Dare me?

Nope this has nothing to do with a certain Dave Mustaine's band but it WILL have you sweating bullets (see what I did there?) and a whole lot more I shouldn't wonder. Hold on to yer asses, this journey might get a little bumpy because my fellow moshers I give you the Mega Death Sauce! A sauce that contains ingredients 500 times HOTTER than a Jalapeno Chile. Crikey! To add to the fear factor(y) it has various 'Warnings O'Doom' on the bottle such as "Use sparingly" and "Not recommended for use without dilution". Gulp. Along with the other spices, Mega Death Sauce contains Habanero Peppers, Cayenne Peppers and Chipotle Peppers. And I simply have to try it. I can deny it to my tastebuds no longer.

Disclaimer: Warning: this product contains the hottest known ingredients on the planet earth. Please use with extreme caution.

It ARRIVED!!

Vindaloo Soup

Yup you read it right! Vindaloo Soup, I went against the naysayers, ignored the doubters and just went ahead and made it. Grabbed a packet of Hidi Grand vindaloo paste (50p from Home Bargains), heated it on a hob without meat (hey it was almost vegan hehe) and tipped it into a bowl. Bingo!
So how did I come up with the idea? Am I so BADASS that im willing to eat 'raw' vindaloo curry? Truth is I was feeling a little under the weather but was tired of boring old chicken soup, so decided a bit more horsepower was needed (emphasis on 'power' not 'horse'.) And do you know what? It wasn't half bad either! In fact if I had used a better curry paste and not some cheap stuff from Home Bargains this would have been fairly f**king awesome! Cleared my sinus headache lovely.
Another bonus was it restored my appetite. Weird huh? Curry seems to have this effect on me, I might be suffering from the dodgiest of stomach pains (very rare due to Ox-like constitution) but one whiff of a strong curry and im healed like Jesus on a leper.


Just add bread

Phall Xmas Curry

Phall curry: all my own work!

I cooked a Phall curry (a Britsh Asian Indian dish) over the holidays because Id never tried one before and as a big lover of the vindaloo I was certain I would enjoy this. And I was moshing right too! (You can see me tasting it for the first time in the vid below).
I used chicken for this curry but you can use lamb or prawns, or even sausage like I have done before with a vindaloo. It only takes 30 minutes to whip up and believe me, if you like curry on the hotter end of the scale, it really is worth making.
Ah yes the heat! Just how hot is it? Well the Phall curry got its name from the word 'phallus' which is meant to indicate how much machismo a man needs to stomach it and it is not on most Indian restraunts menus, it has to be specifically asked for by the customer. Also a lot of Curry Houses will give certificates to those who actually finish the curry but for all this hoo ha, in my opinion the Phall isn't as hot as the Vindaloo. Or at least the one I cooked wasn't, and I bunged a lot of red chilis and onion in to add strength.
Im not saying it was mild, it was hot for sure but it didn't get me reaching for the water. (In fact I didn't feel the need for any drink to cool my mouth during this meal). It didn't have the fierce heat a Vindaloo can have, I experienced a mellow burn only. The Phall is definately tasty however and this headbanger highly recommends it. Just remember that when I say it had a mild heat, its not like a Korma or anything and only fans of hot curries will enjoy this.

Bands to eat to ~ Amon Amarth, Lamb Of God