Curry Bombin' Rissoles

The RissoDaloo™

Heads up Moshers, I bring you lucky headbangers yet another exclusive culinary experience that im pretty certain you haven't tried anywhere else. I call it the RissoDaloo™ and needless to say, it kicks f**king ass! Colour me proud, I love it when a plan comes together (cheers Hannibal!) You want to know something? I don't want to blow an eight ton trumpet here but if it wasn't for folk like me, Mankind would never have discovered the Hot Dog or Cheeseburger. Hashtag FACT.
I love messing around with favourite snacks, and adding my own wicked little twist.
Sometimes it ends up as Epic Fail, like that time I tried a pie sandwich (too 'bready') but occasionally I nail it and we get bacon! Or spicy rissole in this instance. Consistency wise the RissoDaloo™ was slightly thick and heavy but I suspect throwing a handful of chips (fries) onto the plate would solve this. Couple of important points to consider however: adjust sauce to whatever heat level you are comfortable with (Da Bomb will be too hot for newbies) and stick to buying readymade Vindaloo sauce from supermarkets. Why? Because generally these types are not full whack Vindaloo strength, the last thing you want to be doing is adding hot sauce to a good homemade curry (a well made Vindaloo is hot enough.)
Now im not going to say my new creation is gonna change the face of planet, pizza style but if you ever fancy a spicy munch with a definite difference, then my RissoDaloo™ is well worth a shot.


Into the pot

The Toothless Vindaloo

A Carmarthen favourite

Ask a Carmarthen local which Indian restaurant/takeaway is best and there is a good chance they will tell you its Ginger. Read the reviews on websites like TripAdvisor, those will say the same thing. Fancy a good curry in west Wales? Ginger is the place to be. I would normally agree too, only recently they lost a chef to a rival restaurant and when I ordered a takeout from there last Friday, it wasn't up to their usual great standard. Maybe it was an off night? (Though eateries should never have those.) Or perhaps more care is taken with sit down meals? Who knows, but the meal I had was nothing special.
Being a big fan of hot and spicy grub, I naturally ordered a Lamb Vindaloo, special fried rice and chips (fries) but as soon as I had peeled off the cardboard cover of my rice, I knew I was going to be disappointed. The rice looked too yellow, like the cheap stuff you see in supermarkets and the chips were hard. Im a big fan of chips bought in Indian takeaways, they are usually chunky and golden, often better than those found at chippys (fish & chip shops) but these were a very poor show. And as for the Vindaloo itself? It seriously could have passed for a Pasanda or a Bhuna. It was mild to say the least and as for breaking out in sweat? Not a chance! Now I readily admit that due my habit of smashing hot sauces over every meal, my tolerance for spicy food has increased tenfold but come on! A Vindaloo should never be compared to a f**king Pasanda. Im willing to bet that a Korma fan would have coped with it.
I take no pleasure in writing this. In fact I am genuinely sorry to have to write such a negative article about a local place but its the truth my friends. Even the free poppadum was soft.

Feasts of Metal rating: 2/5

My Lamb Vindaloo

Plant Page Curry Combo

Yummy for the tummy

All Hail (capital H hail) moshers! I bring to thee another wonderful meal which won't cost the earth but will almost certainly make it MOVE! Not to mention light you up like a firecracker up an arsonists azz. All you need is a Mayflower beef curry (can be bought in Farmfoods £1.39p) a carton of their egg fried rice (75p) and a teaspoon of Blair's Ultra Death hot sauce (800,000 Scoville Heat Units of hot.) Takes around 8 minutes of nuking in the micro (but you can use the oven) and the taste? F**king DIVINE, proper bloody lusho!
Its like a moshpit on yer tongue but BEWARE ONLY CHILIHEADS NEED APPLY because at 800,000 SHU, the Death sauce turns this usually tame curry into a ravenous sabre toothed kitty cat on the hunt for your screaming, melting innards. Im not joking either, regular readers of this blog will know from previous posts that the Ultra Death sauce isn't messing around.
I have added Blairs to many curries over the last few months but Mayflowers has brought the best results. Its truly very tasty. Also, unlike other readymade curries who skimp on the meat, Mayflowers has a tidy bit of beef in there, so be careful not to overcook (over nuke?) in the micro because if you do? It gets tough.
If you enjoy Vindaloo, this is a decent alternative if you can't be fussed with heading out to a takeaway. In fact its better when you compare it to some of the shoddier takeaways lurking on our high streets. It was definitely a great way to finish off my bottle of Ultra Death (see empty bottle below.) So I had better sign off this post and get ordering more!

Bah

Festive Grub

The tastiest skin from a bird EVER. It might be bad for you but how can something this good be so bad? Makes chicken skim taste like lettuce. Oh my God fathers is it lush. Like an orgasm really. True story.

Below is the festive Phaal curry I make with the leftover meat. Gently fry some onions in lightly oiled saucepan, add the meat, the curry paste (I use Patak's) and pepper and chili and simmer for 15 minutes. You can add tomatoes too if thats your thing.
Oh and cook with some great metal playing in the background. I had Trivium's brilliant Ascendancy album kicking out.




Phaal Curry


Bacon and Cheese on Toast

Vindaloo Soup

Yup you read it right! Vindaloo Soup, I went against the naysayers, ignored the doubters and just went ahead and made it. Grabbed a packet of Hidi Grand vindaloo paste (50p from Home Bargains), heated it on a hob without meat (hey it was almost vegan hehe) and tipped it into a bowl. Bingo!
So how did I come up with the idea? Am I so BADASS that im willing to eat 'raw' vindaloo curry? Truth is I was feeling a little under the weather but was tired of boring old chicken soup, so decided a bit more horsepower was needed (emphasis on 'power' not 'horse'.) And do you know what? It wasn't half bad either! In fact if I had used a better curry paste and not some cheap stuff from Home Bargains this would have been fairly f**king awesome! Cleared my sinus headache lovely.
Another bonus was it restored my appetite. Weird huh? Curry seems to have this effect on me, I might be suffering from the dodgiest of stomach pains (very rare due to Ox-like constitution) but one whiff of a strong curry and im healed like Jesus on a leper.


Just add bread

Vindaloo x2

Ordered prawn vindaloo and a lamb vindaloo. Which one was hottest? Watch the vid and find out. Both were 5 stars and if you want one yourself go to Farhin's on Priory street in Carmarthen. Seriously good curries. And no, im not on their payroll.



Prawn on left, lamb to the right

Farhin's Balti Tandoori

For a fabulous Balti Tandoori

After being a customer for over five years now (and satisfied every time), I feel the time is right for me to dedicate an entire post to Farhin's Indian takeaway in Carmarthen, rather than giving them a mere mention in random articles. They deserve it, they really do. And if you happen to be in the area and fancy a curry, drop in and taste what im yakking on about. Those tastebuds will thank you.
You will find them in Priory street (opposite Lidl) and are open 5pm to 11pm monday to sunday.
Farhin's use fresh ingredients in their dishes and each is individually prepared, so the chefs are able to cook them to exact requirements should you have any. They are vegetarian friendly too with an extensive menu to suit everyone. Take it from me, this is a gem of a takeaway with a friendly service and wallet friendly prices. Im a fussy eater and if Farhin's can keep even me coming back every weekend, they are doing something great.
I usually have lamb vindaloo, special fried rice with chips & free poppadums and boy I wish I had their vindaloo recipe. Its always mouth wateringly good and I can honestly say ive never had a bad curry there. I can also recommend the milder lamb curry and chicken korma with mushroom rice. Very tasty.
Don't fancy a Balti meal? No problem as Farhin's also make great kebabs which are always handy on the way home from the pub. This place is one of the reasons im happy I moved to Carmarthen years ago because it beats the places I was used to in Burry Port hands down. If you happen to be a curry fan then you simply need to visit Farhin's. Im hungry now.


Special fried rice and vindaloo

Phall Xmas Curry

Phall curry: all my own work!

I cooked a Phall curry (a Britsh Asian Indian dish) over the holidays because Id never tried one before and as a big lover of the vindaloo I was certain I would enjoy this. And I was moshing right too! (You can see me tasting it for the first time in the vid below).
I used chicken for this curry but you can use lamb or prawns, or even sausage like I have done before with a vindaloo. It only takes 30 minutes to whip up and believe me, if you like curry on the hotter end of the scale, it really is worth making.
Ah yes the heat! Just how hot is it? Well the Phall curry got its name from the word 'phallus' which is meant to indicate how much machismo a man needs to stomach it and it is not on most Indian restraunts menus, it has to be specifically asked for by the customer. Also a lot of Curry Houses will give certificates to those who actually finish the curry but for all this hoo ha, in my opinion the Phall isn't as hot as the Vindaloo. Or at least the one I cooked wasn't, and I bunged a lot of red chilis and onion in to add strength.
Im not saying it was mild, it was hot for sure but it didn't get me reaching for the water. (In fact I didn't feel the need for any drink to cool my mouth during this meal). It didn't have the fierce heat a Vindaloo can have, I experienced a mellow burn only. The Phall is definately tasty however and this headbanger highly recommends it. Just remember that when I say it had a mild heat, its not like a Korma or anything and only fans of hot curries will enjoy this.

Bands to eat to ~ Amon Amarth, Lamb Of God

Thanksgiving Vindaloo

Leftovers: curry them!

Since discovering Vindaloo I must have eaten a ton of it. I absolutely love it, even to the extent that its made me want to cook it myself at home (which I do if you've been a regular reader of this site). Its been a food revelation and I hereby claim to be the creator of the Sausage Vindaloo™ which you can find on here.
But this isn't about sausages, its about turkey. Last thursday was Thanksgiving Day in America, and because im a self confessed glutton I celebrate it too. Why not? Everyone should be thankful for the good things in life afterall. Now turkey is not a favourite of mine but seeing as we keep the goose for Christmas, the gobbler it had to be. And I thank my better half for a very lovely Thanksgiving meal, it was delicious even for a turkey.
And of course the only decent thing to do with the leftovers of such a bland bird is curry the thing. Both a vindaloo and the less hot korma were whipped up and served as ever with chips.

Music to eat to ~ Motorhead, Slipknot, King Diamond

It Is Legend

Lamb Vindaloo: Me Wanting Water!

The mighty Vindaloo is a dish that needs no introduction (especially here in the UK). Its a hot curry, much hotter than a Madras or a Rogan Josh, and the most popular meats to use in it are lamb, chicken and prawn. The one in the photo above was prepared by Farhim's Indian takeaway in Carmarthen which is a regular weekend haunt of this perma~hungry mosher.
The Lamb Vindaloo is my particular favourite and should be tried by everyone, even vegetarians. Special fried rice or mushroom rice and chips are common accompaniments, with poppadums of course. First time munchers might want a few pints of chilled beer on stand by too. Or cider. With ice, lotsa ice!
Mosh Fact #1: Curry has become a national dish in Britain but Vindaloo dishes are occasionaly omitted from the menu (one has to request it in some places) because they are too hot for all but the hardcore curry fans. There are pussies about. And interestingly (or not) the first time I ever had a Vindaloo was in 2009. True. Indeed my first ever Indian takeway was in 2005 (I had lamb curry) so I have a ton of lost time to make up.

Music to Vindaloo to ~ Obituary, Cannibal Corpse, Naplalm Death, Bolt Thrower,Death.
Vindaloo theme album ~ Show No Mercy by Slayer.