Phall Xmas Curry

Phall curry: all my own work!

I cooked a Phall curry (a Britsh Asian Indian dish) over the holidays because Id never tried one before and as a big lover of the vindaloo I was certain I would enjoy this. And I was moshing right too! (You can see me tasting it for the first time in the vid below).
I used chicken for this curry but you can use lamb or prawns, or even sausage like I have done before with a vindaloo. It only takes 30 minutes to whip up and believe me, if you like curry on the hotter end of the scale, it really is worth making.
Ah yes the heat! Just how hot is it? Well the Phall curry got its name from the word 'phallus' which is meant to indicate how much machismo a man needs to stomach it and it is not on most Indian restraunts menus, it has to be specifically asked for by the customer. Also a lot of Curry Houses will give certificates to those who actually finish the curry but for all this hoo ha, in my opinion the Phall isn't as hot as the Vindaloo. Or at least the one I cooked wasn't, and I bunged a lot of red chilis and onion in to add strength.
Im not saying it was mild, it was hot for sure but it didn't get me reaching for the water. (In fact I didn't feel the need for any drink to cool my mouth during this meal). It didn't have the fierce heat a Vindaloo can have, I experienced a mellow burn only. The Phall is definately tasty however and this headbanger highly recommends it. Just remember that when I say it had a mild heat, its not like a Korma or anything and only fans of hot curries will enjoy this.

Bands to eat to ~ Amon Amarth, Lamb Of God

Jolly Brekkers

Heaven also comes in boxes

Righto Moshers, its Christmas eve eve, and about time I shared with you the menu I have on offer over the festive holidays. I don't 'do' turkey, I personally think its the blandest, most flavourless meat in existence (apart from maybe limpets), so I always have a goose on my table after Santa has done his bit and left some loot. Also as there is not an abundance of meat on goosey goosey gander, it will be joined by a pheasant. Nothing like a bit of game to go with the festive spread, especially one that has been freshly plucked out from the sky with a well aimed shot. *SMILES*
But breakfast is just as important on Christmas morning, and you will need more than boring old Cornflakes to bring you back to life if you indulge anything like I do the night before. The remedy is in the photo above: laverbread. I wrote about this Welsh caviar in an earlier post not so long ago so you might remember it.
A Welsh fry up! Oh I can smell the delightful aromas as I type! I am healed even before ive applied the damage! Bacon, laverbread, cockles and eggs, accompanied by a mug of tea. Delishimo! No matter how hard you hit the sauce, this will get you rockin' and moshing once again. Hurry up Christmas morn!

Nadolig Llawen i chi gyd! Merry Christmas to you all!


Open sesame...I mean laverbread!

Turbo Cider

Recession crippling you? Is it affecting your booze intake? Well suffer no more as I have the perfect recipe for making your own grog. I know, im pretty special **wink**

Stuff you'll be needing ~

Plastic bottles. Or better get a 5 litre one.

4.5 litres of pure apple jooce (juice but spelt more 'metally') and remember, the better the jooce, the better the resulting grog will taste!

Pack of wine/cider yeast.

Dextrose. You can get two packs for £2 in Superdrug.

How to mix it up ~

Tip half the apple jooce into bottle.

Then add some of the dextrose with some more juice and shake well. Repeat this a few times with Motorhead on the stereo. Careful now! Don't add too much dextrose all at once but make sure it all gets in the bottle. Leave some jooce over.

Now then, bung the yeast into bottle, using what jooce you have left to wash it down in case any yeast sticks to bottle. Wait a few minutes before adding the last of the jooce as it will have foamed up from all the shaking and bunging in of ingredients see. Slap a stopper on the end of the bottle.

According to Turbo Cider experts the drink should become cloudy in a couple of days and remain so for a few weeks. Around the fourth week it should become clear, meaning your cider is ready - though you can keep it for another month or so.

Voila! Serve and enjoy!
It’s pretty fooking crude (think scrumpy more than Magners) but reserve judgement until at least the fourth pint. Its like that. And remember, its not about being classy, its about being blitzed.

Cure for Veggies!

No words need really to be said. Go on veggies lick the screen! Then cease thy silly abstinence from meat and get thee to a butchers. Once there, order a few pounds of bacon rashers then get on home (after having bought a dozen eggs also). Turn on an oven hot plate and put a frying pan on top, with a dollop of oil/lard in it. When sufficiently hot enough, fy the bacon first, then the egg. By now your nostrils will assaulted by such an intoxicating smell, the smell of sizzling swine, that resistance will be futile and you will begin to realise what a fool you have been.
Once fried to perfection, put the bacon/eggs, that magical combination, inbetween two slices of buttered bread. Add brown sauce if it pleases you. A mug of tea is the preferred beverage to accompany this. Now eat! And you are now cured.

Thanksgiving Vindaloo

Leftovers: curry them!

Since discovering Vindaloo I must have eaten a ton of it. I absolutely love it, even to the extent that its made me want to cook it myself at home (which I do if you've been a regular reader of this site). Its been a food revelation and I hereby claim to be the creator of the Sausage Vindaloo™ which you can find on here.
But this isn't about sausages, its about turkey. Last thursday was Thanksgiving Day in America, and because im a self confessed glutton I celebrate it too. Why not? Everyone should be thankful for the good things in life afterall. Now turkey is not a favourite of mine but seeing as we keep the goose for Christmas, the gobbler it had to be. And I thank my better half for a very lovely Thanksgiving meal, it was delicious even for a turkey.
And of course the only decent thing to do with the leftovers of such a bland bird is curry the thing. Both a vindaloo and the less hot korma were whipped up and served as ever with chips.

Music to eat to ~ Motorhead, Slipknot, King Diamond